February 22, 2026
Every family’s experience is different - that’s why we reach out to families around the world to share their experiences in growing their languages.
Gina and her husband are native English speakers living in the United States who have added German to their home languages. Before meeting each other, both parents had spent significant time in Germany and had a nice base level of the language, though far from perfect. While researching for our latest issue of Little Language Labs, we sat down with Gina to hear more about her journey and experiences.
LLL: Tell us about making the choice to raise your child in German
G: It was probably when our son was about year old when we really sat down and said “are we going to do this? Because if so, this is the moment.” So we decided to give it a shot. Worse case scenario, it will expose him to a new culture and a new language, even if he doesn’t end up really speaking it as an adult. Now at this point, we’ve been going for about a year.
LLL: What helped you reach that decision?
G: We both speak German, so when we got married it was always on my mind that we could potentially do this. I’m the perfectionist between the two of us, so I kept coming back to the idea that it wouldn’t be worth it if he couldn’t speak perfect German. It was my husband who really pushed that it’s a benefit to our son even if it’s not perfect.
LLL: How have your families supported this choice?
G: For the most part, my parents have been very supportive! I have a brother who went down a similar path in Italian - they’ve kind of lost it, but their oldest speaks decent Italian and it gets less and less with each of their children. My parents are interested to see if we can do it maybe better, but they don’t speak either German or Italian, so they don’t have many tools to help us out.
On the other hand, I think my husband’s parents might find it a bit odd, but generally when we’re around his family we don’t speak German. We’re mostly doing it when it’s just the three of us at home.
LLL: We’re so impressed by your journey and ability to decide to give it a shot. You’ve been on this journey for a year now. What’s surprised you? Has it been smooth sailing or have their been moments where you question what you’re doing?
G: I think the biggest challenge has been with my German - we’re talking about diapers and rashes and those are not words that are commonly known. It’s tricky to look it up in a dictionary and actually know how it would be used in context. I’m lucky to have a friend who grew up in Germany, so if I’m very confused I can ask how to tactfully say “I think you pooped.” I realize quickly that I only knew the cuss words in German!
It’s tricky coming to terms with the feeling of having a dull vocabulary - that was our first learning curve. There’s also the awkwardness of talking in another language to a child on subjects you haven’t done before and feeling self conscious, wondering if you’re doing it right. Ultimately it takes practice and time. I don’t feel awkward anymore.
Typically, we divide the time so we speak German in the mornings, then switch to English after naptime. But sometimes I catch myself in the evenings slipping in a German phrase, because it feels so much more natural now.
LLL: That’s beautiful - I think we all have that experience a bit when we learn a new language and have to take it from a social context to a family or professional one. How has this shifted for you?
G: I’m definitely noticing that the context is expanding. As he gets older, I’m having to learn more context. We went to a science museum and it was the three of us so I was trying to stay in German. I realized - man, I do not know how to talk about as much science in German as I thought, and I may never really be able to. But I picked up some words so that at least we can go there and not have to switch to English.
LLL: The resources should be for parents, not just for kids! But the important aspects is that you’re giving them a foundation and then wherever they take it and how they grow is great. It’s great that you feel more comfortable - have there been any big win moments for your family?
G: He’s started talking a lot in the last two months. And it’s been amazing how even it is between German and English. We even notice that he code switches, too, so he’s more likely to respond to me in German in the mornings and English later on. And it’s so exciting that he’ll pick something up and initiate conversation using the German word or the English word. If we’re being honest, I had low expectations for how much speech he would actually produce, so we’re really excited for that.
LLL: That’s incredible! We’re curious, have there been any things that have helped you when it’s been hard?
G: The biggest thing has been letting go of the perfectionism. It’s okay if I don’t know the word, and its okay to just say it English if I need to. When we first started, I did a more gradual build up. We started with one or two hours and built up our endurance of being able to stay in a second language for long periods of time. We’re also flexible - as I mentioned before, when we’re with my husband’s family, we aren’t so strict about the time division for the languages. We kind of make this up as we go!
LLL: That flexibility in the structures you’ve built it important in the research for keeping things sustainable. Any other advice for parents who are considering trying this out?
G: I’ve used a lot of internet resources like Reddit. I stumbled on a thread on a German subreddit looking for TV shows and support materials, where they were telling me it wasn’t worth doing if you’re not fluent because your child will speak an imperfect language - that basically, it’s setting them up for failure. I really took that to heart and was despondent and frustrated. But that sparked a conversation with my husband of well, okay, we don’t speak perfect German. But if our kid learns German later on high school it won’t be perfect then either. So for me it helped us switch our perspective. Maybe native Germans think we’re stupid for doing this, but to me it made it feel more worth trying - this is about exposing our kid to new culture and languages.
If we get to a point where he stops speaking and all he can do is understand, that’s still such an advantage in any situation, and will be an advantage if he chooses that he wants to be able to speak. And so I feel like no matter what, I can be proud, even if it wasn’t 100% of what we aimed for.